It is Safe to Leave the Room

Recently I had the opportunity to be around some close acquaintances......I would be stretching it to say friends, because these are not "my people" in that sense.  However, we have known each other several years.  We know each other well enough to inquire about each other's families.  We know each other well enough to tease and laugh together.  You get the idea.....this is not the group I call at 4:00 in the morning about a personal tragedy, however, they would be on the call list, but just much further down.

So here's the thing I noticed.  We all sat and talked and hung out, but as soon as one person would leave the room, they would become the topic of conversation.....their secrets shared, opinions given about their anything and everything.  Who knows if any of it was true.  The person was never in the room to defend or deny.  And quite frankly, it just felt mean, weird and totally unnecessary.

I thought, wow, I better cut back on my diet coke consumption......this doesn't seem like a good group to leave to use the restroom.

And that thought alone made me feel sad for this group.  It made me feel sad that people use embarrassing others and tearing others down to lift themselves.  It made me ashamed to be in this group at all.  I wasn't the only one, there were one or two others who tried to steer the conversation to more generic, less offensive topics.

People can be weird.  Adults can sometimes be very childish.  And sadly, we can all feel like we are in middle school again.  We can only do so much with the actions of others.  Sure we can call them out.  Sure we can ignore them.  Sure we can distract from them with pleasantries.  But who they decide to be is totally up to them.

But here is what each of us can do......we can be that person with whom it is safe to leave the room.  Go ahead and go to the restroom, we will chat among ourselves about recipes we should share.  Go ahead and grab something from the kitchen, we will toss ideas around about the best thrift stores in the area.  And please, don't mind us, we will just discuss the best retailers with free shipping.  Whatever it is you need to do, please know it is Safe for you to Leave the Room.

Be someone with whom it is safe to leave the room.......the whole world will be better for it.

I want to be that safe person.

I hope you will make an effort to do the same for your friends.

Attention friends and family, you may now move about the world freely.  You are safe here!

Have a great week!